Tatsumi's Regret revised
by demonlifehealer
Summary: Tatsumi has always hated Muraki because Muraki was able to win where he lost in the game of love. TatsumiTsuzuki very briefly, MurakiTsuzuki.


I was looking at my old fics and saw how many strange sentence structures and misspelled words there were so I took it down and revised it! Lol, I hope everyone likes it with proper spelling!

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It was a normal day at the summons department. The never ending pink petals from the sakura trees blew in the warm wind. Tatsumi sat in his office at his mahogany desk. He looked through the open door at Tsuzuki. His favorite worker was sitting there at the computer slowly typing a report with one hand while the other hand was delicately balancing a piece of cheesecake.

The secretary let a humble smile as he watched as Tsuzuki's head would watch the computer screen for about two seconds before the guardian's eyes would slowly turn to the cheesecake in his hands and take a bite. That was Tsuzuki alright, though the smile turned to bitterness. Tatsumi watched Tsuzuki and couldn't believe that the clumsy over emotional guardian hadn't had the courage to tell him.

Tsuzuki was seeing Muraki. Of course it was kept on the hidden, but it still hurt. It hurt Tatsumi that Tsuzuki didn't trust him enough to tell him. It hurt him that Tsuzuki was trying to hide that from him. It hurt Tatsumi that he wasn't enough. But what hurt the most was that it was Muraki who had helped Tsuzuki. Yeah, that hurt the most. That a murderer elicited more of a positive response in the shikigami commander than he could.

How did Tatsumi find out about Tsuzuki dating Muraki? Well he spied on him of course. Tatsumi had made it a habit of spying on his old love from time to time, just to make sure Tsuzuki was alright. Tatsumi saw himself as Tsuzuki's guardian angel. He remembered quietly following Tsuzuki one night. Tatsumi made sure to stay in the shadows. It had surprised the secretary that the amethyst eyed guardian didn't just go straight home or to the late night café to splurge on sweets.

Instead Tsuzuki went past his apartment and hailed a cab. This caught Tatsumi's interest. When did Tsuzuki have someplace to go? The shadow master's curiosity was piqued so he followed the offensively yellow cab. The cab went on for about three miles until a luxurious hotel came into view. The cab stopped and Tsuzuki paid for the ride. Tatsumi was in shock! Tsuzuki shouldn't have money for a hotel of that caliber! The shikigami commander had debts to pay off! Tsuzuki cautiously looked around before he stepped inside the hotel.

Tatsumi watched carefully in the shadows. He looked at who was waiting for Tsuzuki in the lobby. How could he not. He hated that man.

Muraki.

The secretary had to keep from attacking the man outright. The worst part was that Tsuzuki was walking toward him! The doctor flashed his beloved a smile as he walked up and gave the guardian a chastised kiss. Tatsumi wanted to vomit. Why wasn't Tsuzuki attacking him? Muraki must have blackmailed Tsuzuki. It was the only logical thing!

It was then that the shikigami commander did the strangest thing. He flashed a smile. A REAL smile. Tatsumi loved and hated that. For many years he had tried to get Tsuzuki to flash him that smile, but he could never get there. Tsuzuki never showed him that smile. It was then that Tatsumi knew that Tsuzuki wasn't being blackmailed. The doctor looked respectable, it even seemed that the perverted look had died down even though it was definitely still there. If that wasn't enough evidence for Tatsumi, Tsuzuki leaned into the doctor's touch and the two strolled into the elevator, no doubt about ready to go to their hotel room.

It was after that moment that Tatsumi knew of what Tsuzuki was doing. The change had been noticeable. Tatsumi tried to pretend that he didn't know what was going on. Tsuzuki was nearly dancing around the office in happiness. Tatsumi didn't really know how he felt. In one respect he was happy that Tsuzuki was so elated and he seemed less depressed, but why did it have to be Muraki? Wasn't he good enough? Why did he lose to Muraki?

It had always been like that with Tsuzuki. Tatsumi remembered back to their past when he had Tsuzuki as a partner. Back then while Tatsumi had quickly grown frustrated with Tsuzuki's impulsive and self loathing behavior, he also loved that Tsuzuki could care so deeply about people instead of shielding himself off. If Tatsumi only knew how wrong he was.

Tsuzuki had grown on him, in some respects Tsuzuki reminded Tatsumi of his mother. Tatsumi wanted to help Tsuzuki. He wanted to protect Tsuzuki. He thought that if he was there for Tsuzuki then maybe he could help the shikigami commander. The secretary was convinced that all Tsuzuki needed to be healthy was someone to be there and guide him. He would show Tsuzuki a world of new, good, better emotions. Instead of the dreary world that the guardian lived in. He had asked Tsuzuki out and they went to a café and a movie. It always had Tatsumi happy that his guardian was so enraptured. Tatsumi began to try to slowly probe deeper and make Tsuzuki reveal his problems. That was his first mistake. Trying to see behind the facade.

He was invited into the world of Tsuzuki's bipolar moods. That was a place of extreme guilt and fear. Rejection remained key. Tatsumi tried to show Tsuzuki about love and physical pleasures. They didn't have sex because Tsuzuki didn't want to. He said he didn't want to bind Tatsumi to a monster like himself by the action. Tatsumi learned that Tsuzuki took sex very seriously even though he was still a virgin. A few dates later and Tatsumi realized that he couldn't handle Tsuzuki's emotional outbursts. He realized that he was way over his head.

Tatsumi actually didn't want to face anymore of Tsuzuki's bipolar and immature behavior. He did the cowardly thing and requested another partner without telling Tsuzuki. He didn't say goodbye and he left. Of course this only added to Tsuzuki's feeling of rejection and destroyed him further. Imagine the awkwardness of seeing each other again after so long. The two were civil and never brought up the leaving. Tatsumi then tried to make it his goal to protect Tsuzuki from afar, since he obviously couldn't do it near.

The accountant always regretted not trying harder, but even he saw it. Tsuzuki saw him as a friend or a guardian but not as a lover. Not really. Not like with Muraki. That was why he hated the doctor. Not for the serial killings or the taunts but for the fact that Muraki had made Tsuzuki feel. He had succeeded where Tatsumi had failed.

Unlike himself, Muraki went straight to the heart of the problem. He stated a fact. He was always blunt with his intentions. Muraki didn't try to change. He accepted Tsuzuki as he was. The doctor didn't care if Tsuzuki went into a tantrum or became depressed or hated him. He loved Tsuzuki and even more then that Muraki had PASSION for Tsuzuki. Tsuzuki returned the feeling. Muraki wasn't routine or simply trying to be there to save Tsuzuki. He desired Tsuzuki and truly loved Tsuzuki. That was why Tatsumi hated the doctor. Instead of trying to deny Tsuzuki's demon nature he relished in it. When it became to much for Tatsumi he left but Muraki stayed through much worse than what Tsuzuki put him through. That showed that Muraki truly cared. It also showed the different methods. He stayed from afar and Muraki went unbelievably close. It was their different styles.

That didn't mean Tatsumi trusted Muraki. Just because the doctor could make Tsuzuki feel didn't mean he wasn't still evil, so Tatsumi only spied on them to see if Tsuzuki was safe.

Or so he told himself.

Tatsumi really hated the doctor. When it was time to leave he followed Tsuzuki and Muraki out to dancing and made sure to stay hidden. Muraki and Tsuzuki did make a cute couple. The shikigami commander wore all black and Muraki wore all white. Like they were meant for each other. The two danced into the night, sometimes the movements were graceful and at other times they were grinding, but there was no denying the passion in both their eyes. He tried to push back the feeling of betrayal when Muraki pulled out a ring and proposed. Tsuzuki smiled and jumped into the murderer's arms in glee. It was fairly obvious what the answer had been.

Tatsumi sadly pushed up his glasses and went home…..alone.

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Well there was my attempt at a one shot. Did you know in the manga Tsuzuki actually has a dream of Muraki proposing to him? I hope this is well. My first attempt at posting this was horrible so I removed it and fixed the odd sentence structure and spelling errors.


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